Reminder: Everything I write is a thought experiment. I'm just reflecting here to get it out of my mind and on to paper.
To Do: What do I have to do today?
I've got a lot of things I need to get done. None of them terribly important but all necessary. But, what are the things I absolutely have to do today? What are the things that if I don't do them I will pay the price in some way. Life is better when you know what your priorities are and work to get them done. That is how you feel good about your day.
"To do what you gotta do, you gotta do what you gotta do."
Me: Timothy Simpson
What used to be fun has now become a must. Exercise. I am terribly overweight. It doesn't matter why I got this way. All that matters is that I find a way to live life and lose weight on a consistent basis over time. Since I have about 90 pounds to lose until I get below a 25 BMI, or normal, level, I've got to do things every day to get that done. If I do it right it will take a year. At 2 pounds a week, we're looking at 45 weeks.
Everything depends on this. How I feel. My vitals, and my general feeling of self-admiration instead of loathing. All of my levels will go back to normal if I get this done. It means life or death for me, really. So, this is one thing I have to do every day without break.
- Walk
- Eat Right
- Don't be sedentary in the evening.
Both of those things have to happen. With walking it is a matter of taking the time to do it. With eating it is a matter of knowing what to eat and when. The evening must include walking. So, it is sort of like bookends with walking. Walk when you get up and walk when before you go to bed. In the middle of the day, walk after lunch. There you have it.
Work is the activity of life. If you want to think accurately about life then it is all about getting something done. Achievement isn't winning a gold medal, achievement is simply getting something done and that takes work.
What IS work?
Work by definition is basically the act of moving something from one place to the other that means something. In physics they talk about work as in how much energy does it take to roll a pound sized ball up a ramp to the top. Literally everything is work. It isn't that it is hard, but its that you have to do it.
There lies the problem. Honestly, I don't want to do anything. Ever. But, why is that? Am I lazy? Yes, probably. But, why? Because it all feels futile.
Well, so what if it is all futile?
Why wash the car if it is just going to get dirty again? Why walk if I'm just going to sit again anyway? What's the point?
The point really is ...
If you get stuff done, you won't have to do it anymore.
When you wash your car it is clean for at least a week or so. When you walk you will feel better in the meantime. Nothing lasts forever, therefore everything is futile. It is about creating a life that is beautiful for yourself today and that requires activity.
"Boredom is the feeling that everything is a waste of time, Serenity, that nothing is." Thomas Szasz.
Is that ever true. The feeling of futility and boredom is a constant with me. It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have this unknown urge that I have to do something. I'd love it if I could just be okay with sitting on a park bench like Eckhart Tolle in his book "The Power of Now". Right now, everything is fine. I can handle my life right now. I can't do anything about the past and the future isn't here yet. Right now, I'm fine.
The problem with that is it gives you a bit of an out not to do anything and eventually that will come back to bite you. All of the years I've spent avoiding exercise has caught up with me and now I have a long walk before me to get back to where I should be and I'm not taking any damn drugs to do it. So, it is either do it or not and accept my fate.
What do I have to do today?
Walk, eat, sleep, work. That's about it.
Why is that so difficult? It's not. But, you have to do it.