I’ll admit it.
I have been through it and I am done with it.
What is it?
Trying to figure out what to say that I think other people want me to say.
That is crazy, isn’t it?
I’m not a telepath. I’m not a psychic. I’m not someone who can read minds. There is no way for me to know what another person wants, should want or needs.
Yet, I try to do what other successful writers or speakers do. It works for them, it should work for me. But it doesn’t and it won’t.
When gurus use the “you” word as in, “You need to exercise every day.” it has always made me feel like saying to them, “You don’t know what anyone does.”
Well, they don’t know what the people reading or listening to them do. This is just an example, but surely you know what I am talking about. It is this “I know better than you” type of statement that keeps them above “you” and makes you feel like you don’t know anything.
I look back at my past efforts and realize that I was trying to do the same thing, establish myself as an authority by “you-ing” people into submission.
The truth is, I don’t have the slightest clue what is good for “you.” I’m not even sure what is “good” for me, so why try and write about something you aren’t sure of? What good does it do to act like an expert and be an amateur in doing so.
I can’t know what people want from me. All I know is that when I go to produce content it is more of a treasure hunt than it is a treasure find. I am at my best when I don’t try and be an authority but a thought provoker.
The only thing I actually feel comfortable with writing is what I happen to be thinking that day and it doesn’t really have to be in any certain direction. I am sharing my thoughts and I have no control over whether it will resonate with anyone or not.
I am not claiming to be right about anything. I am not here to preach my gospel, but to search for my voice. This is what can make me unique.
In my quest for my book project “Boredom to Brilliance” all I wanted to do is help people understand how powerful having an artistic mission can be. But, during my project I lost sight of that mission and let myself worry about things like sales, marketing and becoming an expert instead of continuing to speak my truth and to share that with people.
This, of course, is something nobody suggested I do, in fact they all advised against it. When you lose your direction in life the only way to find it again is to get back on the path.
The arts have a lot to do with beauty. The world is in desperate need of it. Not only visual, but also aural and sensual. But, most of all, our thoughts must be beautiful.
So, whatever it is I do from here on, it is going to have to be along the lines of my original mission. To use the power of the arts in me to create a beautiful life and share that with others.
I don’t know if others will be interested in it or not. I have no control over that. But, as long as I create what is in me to create then I am doing what I am supposed to be doing and not play musical chairs with what I think other people need from me.
People need us to be the best of who we are, not the person we think other people want us to be.